Alcoholics Anonymous- AA

an idiot's guide to AA

It’s easy to feel like an idiot when confronted with something entirely new and perhaps intimidating, especially when that newness also involves a social movement with a long history and established culture. The reality, though, is that if a person is considering giving AA a try, they are far from being an idiot.

Full disclosure: I am a psychiatrist and addiction specialist, thought not a member of AA I have had a chance to attend some very robust meetings where I witnessed the powerful potential of peers to respect and help one another in a very serious enterprise.

As an outsider with intent to write a short piece on how to navigate entry into AA, I consulted with a very experienced friend and got some tips.

First, the culture. AA is a volunteer organization dedicated to helping others. This attitude is embedded in many AA members, so in attending a first meeting one can expect a friendly and welcoming environment.

Finding meetings is not hard. AA.org will get you started, and there is a phone app that can be downloaded, “Meeting Guide,” that is available for Android and Apple users which will help you find meeting in hour locale.

I’m told that it is not a bad idea to start with meetings at a local “Alano Club.” The latter is a label signifying a place that holds lots of meetings. In the our North Carolina's Triangle, there is one in Raleigh. More specific info is available through the Triangle's local online portal: https://www.aanc32.org/

Meetings have different agendas, including speaker meetings, discussion groups, and 12-step meetings. My friend advised going to either a discussion or speaker meeting for a first visit. There are also closed and open meetings; as a newbie, one would choose an open meeting where all comers are welcome.

For those who are shy, like a lot of us in a new social setting, I have been assured that one need not participate as a newbie, one can comfortably sit in the back and observe. For the most part, one’s hesitancy is expected and respected.

Once in the door, a newbie can check out the meeting's vibe. When meetings conclude, it is common for people to hang around a bit, and newcomers can expect that some AA members might offer a friendly handshake with a wish to make them feel welcome. It is often these small social interactions after the formal meeting that allow the prospective member to ask questions.

It’s important to know that any given geographical area will often have dozens of meetings throughout the week, often with different groups of people who have coalesced around a mutual sense of respect and trust. For the newbie, if something doesn’t resonate at the first meeting, s/he can navigate to a different group that feels more congenial. Experienced AA members recommend sampling a number of groups if necessary, to a group where one feels comfortable.

There are some common and predictable issues that people often experience that lead them to feel wary of AA. I’ll mention a few.

First, there is the issue of a “higher power.” People tend to construe that this means AA is a religious culture. Over and over again, I am reassured that “higher power” is something one defines in a personal way. One person might describe this as God; another might, as I did when I attended a few powerful meetings, as the healing energy of the serious social connection that can can occur in meetings.

Then there is the issue of personal autonomy and the understandable reluctance some people feel to join a social climate where values or approaches to life might seem different and intrusive. This is where group selection for the newcomer can be most reassuring. I’m somewhat of an independent type myself, so I would gravitate toward a meeting group where differences of opinion are expected and respected, and in my case, even debated!

Finally, there is the issue of commitment. A common goal one hears newcomers quoting is attending 90 meetings in 90 days. Who wouldn’t be hesitant about that kind of commitment? Again, given the diversity of how people approach challenges in life, it is entirely reasonable to want to proceed at one’s own pace and engage to a degree that feels useful. Reasonable people will not expect you to follow the formula that works for them; rather, they will simply expect you to be honest with yourself.

Full circle and back to our “idiot’s guide.” Don’t feel like an idiot just because something is new or confusing. In exploring AA, you are engaging with a deeply respected social organization that has helped over decades many people achieve sobriety and is robustly backed by science. Notably, the Cochrane Collaboration—one of the most trusted voices in evidence-based medicine—has concluded that AA is not only comparable to formal treatments, but may offer an advantage when it comes to sustaining recovery over time.